drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
areolas are like halos for boobs.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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