Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
