when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
