Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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