well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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