I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
