he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
