I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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