D3 body, D1 cock
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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