I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
