Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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