i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I would ride that face into the sunset
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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