i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
