D3 body, D1 cock
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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