She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
