I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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