I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
