im so drunk with asians
where?
always
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He did a backflip because drugs
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
