Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
