How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
