It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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