I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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