i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
