am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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