He asked me if I "almost moaned"
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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