I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
