How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
