I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
