New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Randomize
