I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
