i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
