If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
he's gonorrhea incarnate
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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