i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
