from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
