Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
