i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
