My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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