hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
