im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
