I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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