I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize
