hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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