I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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