if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Come share oat with me in your robe
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
