Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
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Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
