I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
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