is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
