Sry I called you an 8
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
We talked him into tasing himself.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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