what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
