She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
wow bdsm is so cute
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
